Stresslaxing means stressing about relaxing. Worrying about a lot of unfinished tasks while trying to relax can backfire
Are you stressed out while trying to force yourself to relax? You are not alone! We have a million things going on in our minds all the time, so even if we take a few minutes to relax, our brains are still working at full speed. Stressing out, or worrying about your pending chores or unfinished tasks while you are relaxing, is actually counterproductive.
Relaxation is when we are under stress and are taking time to relax and not do the tasks at hand. Many of us do not view relaxation as a means of self-care. Instead, we treat that time as free time and fill it with mental plans on notes about the commitments at hand. Maybe it is time to stop the stress-induced free time and give your mind a rest, right?
What is stress relief?
Stress laxing is a feeling in which you are tense because you are relaxing and not working or doing things that make you stressed. Psychologist Sheena Sood explains, “It's like going to the beach to relax after a stressful week, but you still have to think about office work. In today's times, many of us feel uncomfortable relaxing.”
Stress is the anxiety you feel when you're trying to relax. So activities that are supposed to relax you, like taking a walk on the beach, or lying down with your eyes closed, are totally making you stressed out. A study done by Penn State Research shows that people who have anxiety resist relaxing and continue to worry during it. Relaxation techniques can often make them anxious and even fearful.
Why does trying to relax create stress?
Trying to relax causes stress! Here's why:
1. Social demands
Sood says that rest is seen as a luxury and society demands that we rest only after we have completed all our commitments. So, then it becomes difficult to relax or strive for it, because commitments never end. This culture of constant productivity can make it very difficult for our mind and body to relax. A study conducted by the American Psychological Association shows that effort is glamorised today, even if it does not yield any results. This constant need to strive can make you unable to relax.
2. Burn out
Many of us tend to rest only when we are tired or physically stressed out from work. “Now, in this situation, trying to rest is not really what is happening. Instead, we are trying to recover and often find ourselves feeling guilty for not recovering sooner. So, we become stressed about resting because of this vicious cycle,” explains Sood. So, trying to rest when you are mentally tired may be a bad idea. The study, published in Nature Human Behaviour, says that trying to relax during meditation may increase stress in these situations.
3. Insomnia
Often trying to relax leads to sleepless nights as we question ourselves – do we deserve to relax and are we being lazy? This self-doubt affects our sleep to a great extent and makes it difficult to relax ourselves. A study published by Scientific Reports examined the brain activity of people suffering from insomnia. They had increased activity in the prefrontal cortex, which is responsible for planning. So when you are trying too hard to sleep, you may feel stressed.
Why is it hard for some people to relax?
Rest is seen as a luxury and you need to earn it, this is the mindset these days. “People have not understood that resting is productive and have only understood that working hard is a form of productivity,” says Sood. Therefore, many of us cannot relax. Rest is not seen as self-care, it is seen as selfishness. “How can a parent relax and not work for a child? How can you be a good employee without working endless hours? These questions create self-doubt in people and hence, we find it difficult to relax,” says Sood. There are many reasons for not being able to relax such as stress, depression and anxiety. For some people, rest also has a negative connotation. A study published in Computers in Human Behavior
What are the long-term effects of stress relief?
The long-term effects of stress relief are as follows:
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1. Physical illness
If we are always stressed about resting then our body never gets the rest it needs and stress has a direct impact on our health – causing physical illness or making existing illness worse.
2. Insomnia
Not being able to relax means you can’t unwind, and your sleep is affected, which can lead to insomnia – where you’re sleep-deprived and your productivity is greatly reduced.
3. Mental health issues
Lack of rest and stress around rest leads to mental health problems like anxiety, depression, etc.
How to relax easily?
It is very important to rest to refresh yourself. Here are some tips that you can follow.
- With the help of a professional, overcome the guilt about relaxation and understand that relaxation is productive.
- Incorporate self-care activities into your daily routine that feel relaxing – short walks, yoga, or enjoying a cup of coffee are some examples.
- Try some mindfulness and grounding meditation – embracing the present moment and soaking in all the little joys in life.
Summary
While some people consider relaxation a time to relieve stress, for many people this time of relaxation is stressful. This is what we mean by stress relief. It is important to note that people suffering from anxiety are prone to this condition. Other causes include insomnia, social pressure and stress.